g-Diapers follow up, and more...

Back in 2006 on our adoption blog I wrote a post about g-Diapers and other thoughts about diapers. Now that we have R in our lives I figured it was only appropriate to write a follow up to that post.

First g-Diapers. They are a wonderful in concept. Eco-friendly, stylish, and simple. In our reality they are good, but not great. We got them for R before she was born and used them diligently from the time we returned home until she turned about two and half months old. As it turns out - for us - they were great when she was a new born, but as she grew they became less and less able to contain the "gifts" R bestowed upon the world. I really wanted them to work, but alas we just couldn't find a way to make them work. We tried multiple sizes all to no avail. So, now we're using standard disposable diapers; destroying the world but keeping R, our house, and everywhere she goes a little cleaner.

Secondly, I'd to re-address the idea of a diaperless baby. For those of you who didn't go back to my diaper blog, a diaperless baby is when the parents don't use any diaper, ever. They watch for the tell tale signs from their baby that he or she is going to have a bowl movement and then hold the child over the toilet or some other semi appropriate receptacle. Prior to have a child I thought this would be very difficult, now I think it's totally insane and - practically speaking- it has to be near impossible! First, I'm not sure what the visible signs are. I've spent 24 hours a day with R since she's was born, and although you can definitely tell when she in the process of having a bowel movement (i.e. a combination of grunts, screams, and smiles) I have yet to determine any early warnings. Yes, she's more likely to pee when she first wakes up, and yes she's more likely to poop sometime after she's eaten, but as for a warning sign - I don't see it. Occasionally, she will get a little quiet just before she goes to the bathroom, but it's not consistent at all. The signs are just not there... or at least not with R.

In practice it has to be a nightmare. Yes you cut a year or two off of wearing diapers, but the damage to your home and clothing must be extensive and expensive! The only way I can see this working is if you don't care about anything you own, and have no issues with baby excrement being all over your body. In my old blog I wrote that if I were to try raising R as a diaperless baby I'd "envision myself rushing to the bathroom with baby in my arms only to not quite make it and end up covered in what should have ended up in the toilet." Now, after actually having R, I would have to change that vision to include not just myself being covered in excrement, but also the sofa we were sitting on, the rug, the hardwoods, probably a door knob or two, the bathroom tile... well, you get the point: it would be everywhere! Seriously, the cleaning would take hours, and would likely cause stains that would just require that the sofa (or whatever) would have to be reupholstered or perhaps just junked. Oh, and don't even get me started on night time. I guess parents should just stay awake all night and watch for bathroom queues. Uhm, okay.

Anyway, lots of luck to those who have decided to try raising a diaperless baby. I really admire your courage, but please don't invite me over to your house....:)

~W

P.S. Here's a little video that makes raising a diaperless baby look like a cinch.

Countdown Kids

Hello, my name is William and I have a problem. For the past month I have been unable to get the Countdown Kids songs out of my head. Yes, it's true. As R and I move from task to task throughout the day I sing Countdown Kids songs constantly. For those of you that aren't familiar with the Countdown Kids they are four "kids" who have put basically every nursery rhyme to music. I put "kids" in quotations because I'm not 100% confident that they are kids. Their website shows them in cartoon form, and shows the month and day of their birthday, but no year. The cynic in me thinks it's entirely possible that they are at the very least older "kids' if not full on adults, but I digress. R really enjoys them, I don't hate them, and J thinks they are a little spooky. Regardless of our varying levels appreciation for the countdown kids, I am absolutely unable to get them out of my head. Perhaps it's that the tunes are catchy, or the fact that R and I listen to them for hours a day - but either way they are just stuck in my brain. When their songs aren't actually being played I hear them in my head. Hearing them in my head inevitably means that I'll start singing them, and before you know it R & J are looking at me like I've lost my mind.

It's especially disconcerting when I break out in nursery rhymes at dinner. Here's how one portion of last nights dinner conversation went:
J: "Did you see any more about Tiger Woods?"
W: "No. He's ridiculous.. why would I care about Tiger Woods? He's just another celebrity who failed at being a role model. He's just sad."
J: "True, but he never asked...."
W (singing): "Hot cross buns, hot cross buns. One a penny, two a penny..."
J: "Seriously?"
W: "Sorry. But, don't even try and tell me he didn't want to be in the public eye..."

So, you get the point. Throughout the night I'd randomly break out in song. It's bad. I have to get it under control. Beside being horribly rude (depending on the conversation), it's just crazy. Although, I doubt I have much hope. Until we got the Countdown Kids cd, I had essentially the same issue with songs from The Sound of Music (an all time favorite of mine). Oh well.

~W

A book you should read...

John and I have been long time participants in Abbie Goldberg's (of Clark University) Transition to Adoptive Parenthood Project (TAPP). The study "is aimed at exploring the transition to adoptive parenthood in a diverse group of families." As such, when we got word that the APA would publish her most recent book - Lesbian and Gay Parents and Their Children: Research on the Family Life Cycle- we went to Amazon and pre-ordered the book. I assumed that the book would be interesting, but more than anything I wanted to buy it to show my support for Abbie and her talented team of assistants. The book is billed as "a comprehensive overview of the research on same-sex parenting.." and after reading it I have to firmly agree with that description. As gay man, and now parent, I found it extremely interesting to read.

I could easily relate to many of the challenges and benefits of same-sex parenting that are discussed, and it also added plenty of things for me to think about our child's future. It's amazing to me the vastly different experiences that gays and lesbians experience. I was lucky enough to grow up in an environment that was very accepting of diversity, and to this day have never experienced first hand overt discrimination as a result of being an out, gay man. With that being said, I do recognize that there are many, many, many other LGBT who have not had that same luck, and Abbie's research overview makes it abundantly clear that there is so much more work to be done if we want to live in a world where LGBT folks are considered equals.

Anyway - it's just a really interesting, unique read. You should seriously consider learning about Abbie Goldberg's research by clicking HERE, or buy her most recent book by clicking HERE.

Thanks for reading.
~W